For the time being

Last week I mentioned that “Displaced Texan” describes my current status in life, and that I currently live in not-Texas. And let me say right now, that there is nothing wrong with my current not-Texas setting. Just let me say that for the time being.

I live in (gasp) Oklahoma. Yes, Oklahoma. The Sooner State. “Native America.” Land of state income tax, humidity, casinos, and state income tax (it bears mentioning twice.) There’s not anything wrong with Oklahoma; it’s not a bad place to live. In fact, we are thriving here. It’s just… not Texas.

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At times I am in complete denial of the fact that I live in Oklahoma. I am not (shudder) an Okie. I refuse. My husband is not an Okie. We are Texans. I am a Texan. Period. 

I just happen to live somewhere else for the time being.

Yes, I am a snob about Texas. When I’m asked where I’m from, my answer is always, “Texas, but I live in Oklahoma right now.” When asked where I live, I either say “Oklahoma,” or “Oklahoma, but I’m not from there,” depending on the setting. I don’t want that label, the “Okie” label. I mean, would you label Tiger Woods “mediocre?” Would you label John Wayne a “sissy?” Would you label Michael Jackson “normal?” No, no, and no! So don’t label me.

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Now, my daughter -- God love her -- is, I guess you could say, an Okie, though only because she was born in Oklahoma. But Samantha cannot help where she was born, and I console myself with the knowledge that she was conceived in Iraq (she’s adopted!), which sounds infinitely better than… well, you know. Besides, I think that rule about a-baby-of-American-parents-who-is-born-in-another-country-is-still-an-American rule applies to state citizenship, too.

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Let me reiterate that there isn’t anything wrong with Oklahoma, or any other state, for that matter. (In fact, I love Colorado, though they seem to hate Texans on principle.) It’s just, when you have the good fortune to be a Texan and were blessed to live in Texas for most of your life -- well, then there’s just not that much right with Oklahoma. Texas is bold, and brash, and big. It is the coolest-shaped state, and it used to be a country! Texas is an attitude, a state of mind. Texas is Texas!

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On the other hand, Oklahoma is… ok. Seriously, ok. That’s it, not more; just ok. Remember those old Oklahoma license plates? They read, “Oklahoma is ok.” Huh?

Yes, I get that the state abbreviation is OK and that that song ends with, “O-k-l-a-h-o-m-a. Oklahoma – Ok!” But license plates? Really? On one hand I can see how clever they were, but then again, not so much. I mean, way to strive for mediocrity!

How’s Oklahoma? Oh, you know, it’s… meh.

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And Sooners? Don’t get me started!